#035: Phan Thi Hong Nhung

[luvmyacnq]

Fisrt of all, I want to thank all of you who organize this contest, i think this is a good occasion for us, the youth of quang binh, to look back our english skills and evaluate if our skills meet the needs of english nowadays. So athough i’m quite busy with my study, I try to join this contest.

My name’s Phan Thi Hong Nhung, I was at mathematics class from 2002 to 2005, and the period of time when learning in Quang Binh gifted highschool was really an unforgetable time with me. Now, I’m a third year student of national economics university, my major is accounting. I’m very interested in finance and audit, in a few years, after graduating from university i hope to join an international audit company because I want to attempt to work in such professtional environment. But after that I have a desire to come back and contribute to our province’s inovation. At present i see that the corruption is decreasing the growth of our province, I always hope this will change and i myself could do something to change this.

About myself, I’m a shy girl and always not confident about my appearance. My hobbies are: reading books, watching film, singing (I love singing english songs), and like other girls – shopping ( I especially like looking for sale-off clothes). In spare time I usually surf net to read news and chat with my friends, I love the internet very much because it’s a good mean to keep in touch with my friends in every area of our country.

The summer is coming and I’m looking forward to coming back my hometown to go to the beach for swimming every morning. I love my hometown, Quang Binh, very much because of the fresh air, the peacefulness, and my family here.

Thanks for your reading.

[dieuvuongqb]

Fisrt (First) of all, I want to thank all of you who organize this contest,(Either a period or a semicolon here, and not a comma)i (upper case) think this is a good occasion for us, the youth of quang binh (capitalize proper noun), to look back (at) our english upper case skills and evaluate if our skills meet the needs of english (upper case) nowadays. So athough i'm (upper case) quite busy with my study, I still try to join this contest.

My name’s (better to write out "is") Phan Thi Hong Nhung, I was at (in) mathematics class from 2002 to 2005, and (omit & use period) the period of time when I was learning in Quang Binh gifted highschool (two words; and put a comma here) was really an unforgetable (unforgettable) time with me (omit). Now, I’m a third year student of national economics university, my major is accounting. I’m very interested in finance and audit, in a few years, after graduating from the university (comma) i hope to join an international audit company because I want to attempt to work in such professtional environment. But after that (comma) I have a desire to come back and contribute to our province’s inovation. At the present i see that the corruption is decreasing hampering the growth of our province, I always hope this will change and i myself could do something to change this.

About myself, I’m a shy girl and always not confident about my appearance. My hobbies are: reading books, watching film, singing (I love singing english songs), and like other girls – shopping ( I especially like looking for sale-off clothes). In my spare time I usually surf net to read the news and to chat with my friends, (period) I love the internet very much because it’s a good mean (source) to keep in touch with my friends in every area of our country.

The summer is coming and I’m looking forward to coming back to my hometown to go to the beach for swimming every morning. I love my hometown, Quang Binh, very much because of the fresh air, the peacefulness, and my family lives there.

Thanks for your reading.

Judge: Minh Duc
Score: Pass - Excellent writing
Suggestion:
- Check spelling error for cases in red color
- Use uppercase for cases needed: I, English

[Tocxu]

Fisrt of all, I want to thank all of you who organize this contest, i upper case think this is a good occasion for us, the youth of quang binh, to look back our english upper case skills and evaluate if our skills meet the needs of english upper case nowadays. So athough i'm upper casequite busy with my study, I try to join this contest.

My name’s Phan Thi Hong Nhung, I was at (in?) mathematics class from 2002 to 2005, and (are these period different?) the period of time when learning in Quang Binh gifted highschool was really an unforgetable unforgettable time with me. Now, I’m a third year student of national economics university, my major is accounting. I’m very interested in finance and audit (auditing), in a few years, after graduating from university i hope to join an international audit (auditing) company because I want to attempt to work in such professtional environment. But after that I have a desire to come back and contribute to our province’s inovation. At present i see that the corruption is decreasing hampering the growth of our province, I always hope this will change and i myself could do something to change this.

About myself, I’m a shy girl and always not confident about my appearance. My hobbies are: reading books, watching film, singing (I love singing english songs), and like other girls – shopping ( I especially like looking for sale-off clothes). In spare time I usually surf net to read news and chat with my friends, I love the internet very much because it’s a good mean to keep in touch with my friends in every area of our country.

The summer is coming and I’m looking forward to coming back my hometown to go to the beach for swimming every morning. I love my hometown, Quang Binh, very much because of the fresh air, the peacefulness, and my family here.

Thanks for your reading.

@Duc: I have added a little bit. Basically: "audit" is replaced by "auditing".

[Thiên Bình]

I've also made a few changes and have added them directly onto your post.